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DrunkGecko
Formerly known as StaticSkull. Ligma borthole.

Skarlet Octavia @DrunkGecko

Age 23, Female

Brapping

Brappenwurst College

Hell, Norway

Joined on 1/11/18

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Comments

Welcome back :)

i have my thoughts about death before in the 9th grade, but dont end yourself over the smallest issues. you’ll get through whatever it is that is bothering you, its not worth it, trust me.

i dont wanna sound like a egotistic asswipe, but why a belt?

a belt to hang myself. i dont have rope. didnt work out. im just tired of new problems arising every single time i think ive improved

Oh my god dude I’m glad you didn’t do it. I wish I could do something more but all I do is wish you luck :(

I don't want to die any less. I just don't have it in me. And honestly I don't even the energy to stress about everything. I just feel empty now

@DrunkGecko I hope you find something to live for idk I probably sound stupid

so....you didnt have a belt already?

I remember meeting you on the forums way back. I had admired how funny you were, which is still true to this day. Please keep soldiering on <3 ;(

If it means anything I'm glad you're still here

Not even 24 hours ago I was so in love with you. I would always look forward to our video chats. To see your smile. To feel my problems wash away with your presence. And now that I know you cheated on someone with me, you have become my newest problem. I want to hate you so badly. I want to be angry at you. But I can't, because I understand how self destructive you are. And I know, coming from someone who constantly hurts themselves, this was you self destructing. I understand it. That doesn't make it hurt any less though. You specifically told me you would never hurt me. You didn't think we were just friends who flirted. That's an awful excuse. Friends don't show each other their bodies, say I love you, say I want to wake up next to you, say they want to make love, say they want to move in together. You knew what you were doing. You lied to me. You cheated on me. You hurt me. You broke my heart.

No matter how many times I wake up I still feel exhausted after what you did to me. I did everything I could for you. I stood up for you when nobody else would. I would've given you anything. I look back at all the love songs I wrote for you and I feel so much shame. I feel so empty. I feel so broken. You promised you wouldn't hurt me.

I've been staring into space for hours. My heart is so broken. I can't bring myself to move from this spot

I hope you're proud of what you've done to me. I look at certain games that I knew you loved and I just get sad. The picture of her kissing you makes me physically hurt. We had so many common interests. We watch the same creators. We understood each other. We were perfect for each other. I had never clicked so well with previous partners. Why did you ruin this opportunity? Why did you cheat? We had so much going for us in such a short time. I was wrong. I thought I could forgive you. I don't think I can. I'm just too cowardly to block you. I try to distract myself by playing games. But I played these same games while video chatting with you. I can't detach those memories. I'm in so much fucking pain. How could you do this to me? How could you do this to yourself? How could you do this to us? My heart is cracked.

Yer gonna have to face it sooner or later. Lest you get another episode and this time actually manage to do it. My best guess is either you spend time introspecting and cobbling together a plan so that you solve that ticking time bomb of a problem of yours or get your affairs in order and if you manage to kill yourself, you won't burden your mother with the additional problem of what the fuck she is gonna do with your shit.
Ignoring it, won't make it go away bro, so unless you have a deathwish, deal with it, while you still have a clear head.

My condolences.

W h a t

Holy shit, man. I'm just happy you're alive.

you shouldnt be