I don't deserve any of your respect or kindness

I've spent my whole life crying like a little bitch

I deserve to be thrown in a fucking ditch 

All that stops me from suicide is cowardice 

I deserve the same hatred that I've spread on this planet

Regardless of me being molded into this unwillingly 

I treat my family with hate and can't fucking stand it

I only suffer more from you not killing me 

I wish everyone around me could suffer like me 

My hatred is becoming a gateway to sociopathy 

Bend me over and rape me until I'm bleeding everywhere 

Beat me til my bones break off and I puke from the fear 

A toy for the abuser is all I have ever been good for 

I'm a dirty faggot, I'm the bitch, nothing more 

Too much of a coward cunt to kill myself at all 

A fucking pussy who's suffering will always be prolonged 

You can't help me, you can't save me, you can't cure me 

And you certainly can't convince me any of that is possible 

You can't fix me, you can't tell me, I'll ever be happy

It's not physically or mentally possible, not at all

I deserve to fucking die a most bloody and gruesome death 

And all of you deserve to watch me choke on my last breath

I want to rot, I want to decay, I want to kill myself 

I pray there's an underworld, because I deserve hell 

Don't you fucking dare tell me to love myself

I am fucking trash, and I don't deserve to live 

Kill yourself, kill yourself, kill yourself, kill yourself

My mind is begging for death, but my body doesn't give a shit 

Hate is all that I have known, that's never gonna change 

The only release I'll ever have is when I'm fucking hanged 

I didn't ask for schizophrenia, I didn't ask to be born 

All I ask for is happiness, but all I'm given is scorn 

I can't decide what I deserve more

To live a life of suffering, or die in a pile of gore 

Fuck you, fuck me, and fuck everything

I can't explain my thoughts, so I just fucking scream