As of today, I have tried everything in power to be happy
And much like my attempts in suicide, there was no success
A hotline created for these situations, could not do its job
And so they hung up, abandoning me just like everyone else
How can I be expected to control myself with such primal anger
A rage I wish to inflict even on those I love, as they were of no use
And even now, I am too cowardly to hurt myself or others
And like everyone I reach out to, I am of no use
The turmoil within my crusted brain is only warped
By words that I'm sure are meant to comfort me
I find no comfort in anyone, but I wish I could
Incapable of familial trust, incapable of helping myself
I have nobody, sad voices echo in my head eternally
I cling onto any chances of hope, but I can never maintain faith
Any efforts to better myself, will forever be a waste of time
For in the end, those efforts are stained with bestial hatred
It doesn't matter how fucking hard I try
I will still be wallowing in my blood, sweat, and tears by sunrise
Waiting for the day that a miracle worker can get the job done
I want to die on my time, before I realize it's wrong